Tuesday, April 16, 2013

N is for Negative

Note: The A to Z Challenge is really a challenge for me this year and I'm behind reading your posts and leaving comments. I have a lot on my plate but that's no excuse. I'm sure you all do too. I hope to catch up in the next day or two. For readers not participating in the A to Z Challenge and don't understand it, you can learn more here and explore everything from A to Z. There are 1,758 bloggers participating in the A to Z Challenge. You may want to try it next year.
Today, I'm taking a look at being negative.
My dad was a quiet, shy, pessimistic/negative person. Look at his picture at the right--you can tell by the way he's sitting that he's shy and uncomfortable being the center of attention.
I’ve been accused of being more negative than positive. I used to be more shy than I am now, and of course, since I love blogging, I must thrive on attention. Right?
As for the negative trait? I’m not sure I totally agree but we often see ourselves the way we want to be—not the way we really are.
I admit I’m guilty of looking at what could happen if I did such ‘n such. I not only look at today but I look at tomorrow, the next day and a week from now. Unfortunately that affects my actions when I want to send my work to publishers or agents. I over-analyze and try to visualize the outcome: If I submit ABC story to 123 Magazine, I might be making a mistake. Would 456 Magazine be better? We’re supposed to choose the best publisher, but I usually stall and send to no one. Is second-guessing akin to being negative? Yeah, somewhat.  Especially when we let imagined consequences keep us from doing anything.

Negative means: bad: unhappy, discouraging, angry, or otherwise detracting from a happy situation; pessimistic: or tending to have a pessimistic outlook.

 Mmmm, is that really me? I've been told I'm a great encourager to others. I sure hope I'm not a drain on anyone's goals and dreams.
Honestly, I don’t think I’m negative, but if I am ... I got it from my dad. And he inherited from his mom who ... well, that's as far as my personal experience goes when it comes to pinpointing.

I’m posting a few quotes from Brainy Quote about negativity. They really speak to me. I'm terrible about letting others influence me. If you read my work or hear my pitch and raise an eyebrow in my direction, you're watering my doubt and insecurity. It grows. Are you the same? I hope not. It's a miserable way to be.

If you accept the expectations of others, especially negative ones, then you never will change the outcome.~Michael Jordan

Dwelling on the negative simply contributes to its power. ~Shirley MacLaine

Once you replace negative thoughts with positive ones, you'll start having positive results. ~Willie Nelson

 Which one speaks to you? Do you battle negativity? How? Looking back at family members, do you think your negativity was inherited or something you learned from a parent? Talk to me... and don't be negative!


James R Tate said...

I've always considered myself a positive person but I'm still human. Sometimes life just gets you down no matter how hard you fight it. I find it helps to be around positive people. You know any I could borrow? Just kidding!
Had a GREAT time at the conference. My wife finally understands the passion-I sent her to several workshops to take notes. It's hard not to see the passion of all those writers in one place. Congrats to Sylvia and Linda Todd as well. We showed them a thing or two about our groups.
Had fun visiting with your daughter. She definitely is a positive person. You should be proud.

Megan said...

I think we all try to be positive, but sometimes life events just sorta put a downer on things and we take a negative turn. Important thing is not to get stuck there.


Man O' Clay said...

I haven't felt any negative vibes from you in the past two weeks...I would call you positive, in fact, from what I've read of you and your family in your posts.

I think it's interesting that anger is listed in your definition. There are certainly times that anger leads to negative outcomes, but I can also think of times that anger is necessary.

Good post!

Charles Gramlich said...

You certainly seem like a very positive person to me. I am myself too often negative.

Karen Jones Gowen said...

I doubt that anyone is all one or the other but at any given time we battle the demons and try to keep negativity at bay. Because it's not the happiest way to live is it? My mom kept a positive outlook, my dad not so much. They say opposites attract!

Kimberly Hawks said...

Thanks for visiting my site! I know what you mean about being called negative...but not really feeling like you are "unhappy" all the time. I think being aware of it is the first step so kudos to you! Inspirefly

Silvia Villalobos said...

If you're willing to analyze yourself, I'd say you are an honest person, and that's very important.

We all have our negative moments. Right now I'm negative about watching the news ... nothing there but sad stuff.

Nice meeting you.

Silvia @ Silvia Writes